What have I become 28 days later?... What have I become today?.... this is a question I have been asking myself every night after arriving in Philippines.
It has been topsy turvy… OR so to say… OR maybe not. You see… in AP, I can never imagine a better place to be because from all the countries I have been to, Philippines is by far the most recognizable place close to home. Indonesia comes next. I love the songs here. Have I mentioned that? The radio stations here play non-stop music minus the ads and yacking… it soothes the mood. The songs are good… anything from soft indie right up to sentimental ones. You want night life… you bet! You want shopping? You bet! You want anything at all, you have it all here. Work wise, no complains… that is if you are a workaholic like myself. But if you work hard, you play hard.
My mates have been complaining that I have gone MIA… YES… I have been. Don’t ask me why… it’s just the way it is here. Get to the office at 9am… the next thing I know, its already lunch time at 2pm, and before I know it, its already 9pm… and this is the only time I can really sit down and check my mails. Not long before, its already 10pm, and I haven’t even finished browsing through 5 mails… its dinner time. What life have I got during weekdays? My pathetic mailbox has 1137 Unread emails…. Most of them are to be deleted (cc). I hardly have time to really connect to anyone apart from work. My whole day is filled with meetings after meetings, planning sessions, chasing after subcons and pushing for compliance on schedule. Fun in Philippines? Yet… I still love it here.
*****
On another front… I have had a terrible week trying to deal with HQ. Pakistan wanted me to go back to their project, UFONE. Initially it was only one phone call. Then it started to spread to HQ when even the local directors were asking me to go back. My answer was a firm NO. Still they insisted and a few more phone calls were made. Fortunately, my Project Director here really wanted me to stay and fought with HQ over me. Still… they didn’t give up and a final phone call from both my directors in AP, urging me, requesting me, and begging me to go back to Pakistan, YES…. In the history of my company… they actually did that! and what tops it is that… the AP Director told me to do him a favor and asked me to state my requirements… whatever that is, it is granted. Amongst the suggestions… bring my family there, come back once a month…. Etc….
My answer was still ‘NO’. I told the Deputy Director… even if you gave me an increment of MYR10k now, my answer would still be NO! he was shocked, and told me, OK, understood.
With this, I have resigned to fate that, I am prepared to leave this company once and for all. My resignation letter is ready. It has been ready since I was in UFONE.
I have fulfilled my duties in Pakistan… why me? I have done what I needed to do there. I have formally submitted my handover responsibilities to my deputy. There are in total of 6PMs looking over my ATP there. So, what is the problem? Why me? Why is there an issue with me NOT going back? What are my responsibilities there when I go back there? What will I do back there? All these are unanswered questions from them. They couldn’t give me an answer, YET, they want me to go back there. Why?
See… my reasoning is simple. Give me one good reason why I should go back there and if it’s justifiable, I will. This is no communist OR Marxism style of project management we are talking about. I came back from Pakistan, and they told me to fire fight in Philippines, I fulfilled their wishes and flew here immediately with no questions asked. They said they have my back at all cost. Now they want me back there in Pakistan no matter at what cost. hUh???
*****
Back to reality… I cant say life is not treating me good. It is in fact, really nice. I stay in Makati, the financial district of Manila… say whatever you want, it’s a nice place to be in. It has that LA feel to it, its very Americanized. I have no complains. The chicks here are also really cool. The people here are polite… in fact, too polite. Beers are cheap here. What more can I ask for? But yet, at times, I feel lonely… I am the second youngest PM in Philippines and still single… best part is, no one believes I am still single! All my seniors all over AP wants me to be in their project. Some even professed that if they change projects, they will take me with them. I have all that I ever dream of…. the corporate world dealing with top management and managing my own group of engineers, my own driver, car, and a monthly entertainment budget that most people take home as their monthly salary. Yet, inspite of all these hype, there is still something missing.
*****
28 days later… I am still awaiting what lies ahead..... it's 322am, nite folks.
It has been topsy turvy… OR so to say… OR maybe not. You see… in AP, I can never imagine a better place to be because from all the countries I have been to, Philippines is by far the most recognizable place close to home. Indonesia comes next. I love the songs here. Have I mentioned that? The radio stations here play non-stop music minus the ads and yacking… it soothes the mood. The songs are good… anything from soft indie right up to sentimental ones. You want night life… you bet! You want shopping? You bet! You want anything at all, you have it all here. Work wise, no complains… that is if you are a workaholic like myself. But if you work hard, you play hard.
My mates have been complaining that I have gone MIA… YES… I have been. Don’t ask me why… it’s just the way it is here. Get to the office at 9am… the next thing I know, its already lunch time at 2pm, and before I know it, its already 9pm… and this is the only time I can really sit down and check my mails. Not long before, its already 10pm, and I haven’t even finished browsing through 5 mails… its dinner time. What life have I got during weekdays? My pathetic mailbox has 1137 Unread emails…. Most of them are to be deleted (cc). I hardly have time to really connect to anyone apart from work. My whole day is filled with meetings after meetings, planning sessions, chasing after subcons and pushing for compliance on schedule. Fun in Philippines? Yet… I still love it here.
*****
On another front… I have had a terrible week trying to deal with HQ. Pakistan wanted me to go back to their project, UFONE. Initially it was only one phone call. Then it started to spread to HQ when even the local directors were asking me to go back. My answer was a firm NO. Still they insisted and a few more phone calls were made. Fortunately, my Project Director here really wanted me to stay and fought with HQ over me. Still… they didn’t give up and a final phone call from both my directors in AP, urging me, requesting me, and begging me to go back to Pakistan, YES…. In the history of my company… they actually did that! and what tops it is that… the AP Director told me to do him a favor and asked me to state my requirements… whatever that is, it is granted. Amongst the suggestions… bring my family there, come back once a month…. Etc….
My answer was still ‘NO’. I told the Deputy Director… even if you gave me an increment of MYR10k now, my answer would still be NO! he was shocked, and told me, OK, understood.
With this, I have resigned to fate that, I am prepared to leave this company once and for all. My resignation letter is ready. It has been ready since I was in UFONE.
I have fulfilled my duties in Pakistan… why me? I have done what I needed to do there. I have formally submitted my handover responsibilities to my deputy. There are in total of 6PMs looking over my ATP there. So, what is the problem? Why me? Why is there an issue with me NOT going back? What are my responsibilities there when I go back there? What will I do back there? All these are unanswered questions from them. They couldn’t give me an answer, YET, they want me to go back there. Why?
See… my reasoning is simple. Give me one good reason why I should go back there and if it’s justifiable, I will. This is no communist OR Marxism style of project management we are talking about. I came back from Pakistan, and they told me to fire fight in Philippines, I fulfilled their wishes and flew here immediately with no questions asked. They said they have my back at all cost. Now they want me back there in Pakistan no matter at what cost. hUh???
*****
Back to reality… I cant say life is not treating me good. It is in fact, really nice. I stay in Makati, the financial district of Manila… say whatever you want, it’s a nice place to be in. It has that LA feel to it, its very Americanized. I have no complains. The chicks here are also really cool. The people here are polite… in fact, too polite. Beers are cheap here. What more can I ask for? But yet, at times, I feel lonely… I am the second youngest PM in Philippines and still single… best part is, no one believes I am still single! All my seniors all over AP wants me to be in their project. Some even professed that if they change projects, they will take me with them. I have all that I ever dream of…. the corporate world dealing with top management and managing my own group of engineers, my own driver, car, and a monthly entertainment budget that most people take home as their monthly salary. Yet, inspite of all these hype, there is still something missing.
*****
28 days later… I am still awaiting what lies ahead..... it's 322am, nite folks.
4 comments:
Hmm. I guess although sometimes we come to point in life where we saw ourselves in the beginning....we're still missing something.
Life...maybe?
*smile*
Take care, you.
I suppose so... sad aint it?
Doesn't have to be. It's when the littlest things bring you joy and you cherish every moment, that you're living life to the fullest.
Dreams will always be there for you to reach it. And then there'll be new ones :)
That's the beauty of life.
I hope so... sunshine is back! :-)
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