Incredulous India: Day VI - Day XIV

Initially, it was supposed to be a daily update thingy, but due to time restrain, I will duly summarize it all here. Speaking of India, it has been an eye opener. If every thought counted for a posting, there would be tens of postings. India is just so huge, so overly populated, so rich in content yet, words are hard to come by. I was in an awe and lost for words. Its either you love it, OR hate it. Its more like a love hate relationship. Here goes...

Scenario #I:

Me: I cant wait to see Delhi!... it must be huge
Cab: Yes Sir...
[after 10 minutes]
Me: I wonder when are we reaching...
Cab: Yes Sir...
Me: 0_o .... Huh? I mean, when are we reaching Delhi?
Cab: Yes Sir... passed.
Me: How do you mean? I mean, are we there yet or is this it?
Cab: Yes Sir... Already.
Me: Where?
Cab: Here....
Me: How?
Cab: Here.
Me: What?
Cab: Yes Sir...
....*imagine Penang in its hey days... the post war shoplots, difference is, its shared by at least 3 shop entities, congested streets, 2 way lane shared by buses, autos (Motor taxis), cars, 4W's, bicycles, more like a freeway traffic in the city, no rules, only bounded by instinct and careful driving.*
Me: *in an awe* ... *mouth wide opened*... OooOoooKkkk (the longest Ok for me so far) ....

*eyes wandering around*... *wishful thinking*... *begin spacing out a bit... double spacing*.... *triple spacing*....

Cab: Sir? Sir???
Me: Yeah... *suddenly jolted by the awakening of reality*... Yes?...

*a sense of reconnaisance swept past me, frantically searching for a question or answer as if there was a wave of destruction heading towards me... there was a moment of panic*

Cab: Where do you want to go Sir?
Me: Errr..take me to the nearest tourist spot from here.
*Initially, I wanted to be in Delhi city centre to walk about and feel the Indian metropolitan like how I did for other metros but...*

Cab: I will take you to India Gate *with much anticipation*
Me: Would that be something like Champ De Mars or Champ Elysees?
Cab: Sir?
*Ooopss*

Me: ... nah, forget it. India Gate it is!
[Yes, India gate is something like the arch in Marble Arch or the Independence Monument in Champ Elysees where they commemorate independence by building this huge touristic arch in a rather symmetrical street]

Scenario #2:
...1st Day@Office...

Me: Evening Nisha (a secretary in HW India )
Nisha: Mr Raymond Sir... (yes, they are very courteous people, they usually end the name with a 'Sir', for men).... you have been assigned 'Qualis' for the next 2 weeks of your stay. And the car number plate is 2822.
Me: Oh... that's very nice of you... thank you so much.

* 2 hours on..., as I was walking out of the office compound to look for my car after a long day at work, and I saw this guy leaning against a 4W bearing the number plate 2822*

Me: Hmmmpphh... you must be Qualis.
Driver: Yes Sir. Guesthouse?
Me: Yes. Do you know where is it?
Driver: Yes Sir. Windsor Castle, DLF II, Sector 29
Me: errrr... yeah... Windsor Castle.
Driver: Ok Sir.

*hopped onto the car, Bhangra and Hindi music started playing... it was a bit annoying at first. I figured as much that it was better for me to start talking so that he can turn the music down.*
** After much chatting on Qualis this and that, we finally reached Windsor Castle... *

Me: So, Qualis, what time are you going to be here tomorrow?
Driver: What time you want Sir?
Me: Hmmphh... 830am, Qualis. btw, can I have your mobile number as well?
Driver: Yes Sir. Its +9198....
Me: Good. I will see you tomorrow then. Goodnite.

*..The morning after... at 845am???...*

Me: ..*tut tut...tut tut....* Hello, Qualis?
Driver: No.
Me: 0_o Huh???? Is this Qualis? or may I speak to Qualis?
Driver: No. Qualis... No...
Me: Who is this on the line then? I mean, who's speaking?
Driver: I am Mr Raj Kumar, Sir.
*Not to waste further time... whoever that is... *
Me: Are you coming to Windsor Castle?
Driver: Yes Sir. Coming now. Sorry. Late.
Me: No worries. I am waiting now at the gate.

*5 minutes later, the 4W arrived*

Me: Morning Raj... where's Qualis? (but I felt strange coz I thought he was the same guy last night)
Driver: Here Sir.
Me: (as I opened the passenger seat by the driver's and was about to hop on in, I noticed something written on the side of the 4W just like any other car, it was the SUV's name... there, it was written "TOYOTA QUALIS")
Me: ................ Errr... (adjusting my specs to get a second glance)... ($%@#!##)... (got onto the 4W)... Errrr... Qualis?
Driver: Yes Sir.
Me: Raj Kumar?
Driver: Yes Sir.

*Dumbfounded...Darn!!! all this while... and I thought he was .... and.... spaced out...*

Scenario #3

*...visiting Taj Mahal was indeed not very much a dream come true but more of a Wonder come true... I was in a tour with a group of other working professionals from all around the world...*

Me: Hi... I am Raymond. And...
Jordanian Guy: Hi... I am *Bono... working in Washington DC with the World Bank. You?
Me: I am with Huawei, errr... (glancing at his perplexed look), errr.... its a Telecom company. I am a PM. You must be an economist. Wow...
JG: nah... just a normal worker. Where are you based?
Me: I am from Malaysia. My office's there as well.

*This time around, more people came by and introduced themselves...*

Jacklyn: Heya... I am from London, originally from Liverpool, I am a designer...
Me: Well... that explains... hahaha... textile is big in India...
Jacklyn: Yeah... hey... you sound... (like she found something similar to home and was glad)
Me: err.. you mean the accent?
Jacklyn: yeeeaaa....hhhhh...
Me: I was in Liverpool for 7 years... more like an adopted Scouser and proud to be one! hehehe... I mean, of all places... I get to meet a fellow Scouser in Taj Mahal... unbelievable!!!
Jacklyn: *hands on chest + panting*... seriously... this is great! I've gotta tell me mom about this...
Me: hahaha...
Fernando: Hi... I am from Spain. I work for the UNHCR and is based in NY.
Me: Wow... one hell of a job you have there..
Jacklyn: yea...
JG: So, so, guys... you all crashing at Delhi tonight?
Jacklyn: yeah... I am staying at Radisson SAS
Fernando: I am at ShangRila
JG: hey... that's somewhere near mine. I am Hyatt Regency... What about you Ray?
Me: 0_o.... Errrrr.... Gurgaon.
Jacklyn: Errr.. Where is that?
Me: Its some Tech-City on the outskirts of Delhi
JG: yeah... yeah... they have Radisson SAS there as well...
Me: Errr... no, my company has their own accomodation. I stay in a bungalow.
Jacklyn: That's cool... it must be affiliated to Le Meridien because I heard they have this concept for expats. Its much more fun and cooler.
Me: 0_o.... *I wished* *spacing out*... hey, isnt that our tour guide... I think he's leaving now...

*... talk about mingling with the big players... and mine was just a guesthouse!...aaiii*

So much for my India Trip experience for now. There's so much more... however, dont think I will be able to relate them all here. I have just been posted to Pakistan... this time, it's for real. 6 months it is! Adieu... and Welcome PAKISTAN!! Yeayyy.... NOT!

Incredible India: Day V

Why no updates for the last 4 days. Where was Day II, III and IV? Where did it go to? I wish I know the answer. Every night after dinner, I will surf the net and prepare my presentations, slides and training materials on the bed until I fall asleep. Incredible India? ... maybe... I dont know yet. Work has engulfed me in some ways.

Its Friday now. Tomorrow going to Delhi to experience abit of the heart of India. Thanks Preetam, Yograj and Nisha for planning my itinerary. I dont know how is it going to be like but yeay... at least I am not stuck in Windsor Castle. Need to get out from the PMO mindset... need to just forget work for a while! But India was anything but.

I am in Gurgaon, about 30km from Delhi. It is more like a clustered township/city. It works this way, imagine Delhi to be in the middle and there's a ring road going all round Delhi. Along this ring road, you have clustered townships such like Gurgaon. Its funny how it works. You are driving along this unstructured and unplanned highway and all of a sudden out of no where in the middle of a barren land, real modern buildings are either in the middle of construction or are up.

Think Malaysia has bad and uncourteous drivers? Think again... India is worse. Cars weave in and out, no signals, left right... its everywhere! Miraculously, their accident rate is so much lower than to Malaysia. Datuk Chan Kong Choy should take a cue from here. Best of all, cows, donkeys and pigs roam the streets with ease. The streets are filthy, rubbishes everywhere... really. Some parts in Gurgaon looks like refugee camps. In a way, I am truly shocked. Incredible India... I bet. I just hope its not like this in Delhi.

Till then... chao.

Incredible India: Day I

*all in India time*

2145 hrs - Indira Ghandi International Airport it is. It took the plane almost 15 minutes to manouver around the tarmac before coming to a stop. Long runway that was.

2155hrs - Efficient airport services. Took us only 10 minutes to get off the plane and onto the terminals

2210hrs - Luggage claim was slow. Almost 20 minutes wait.

2215hrs - Got out to the Arrival Hall... couldnt see the HW placard with my name on it. Called secretary and accordingly, traffic was bad. Thought as much, anyway, safety first, got my HW tag out. Within 5 minutes, got spotted. It worked! Voila...

2225hrs - Got into the car, traffic was really bad. Wished I was in Malaysia. But this was better than in Cambodia. The roads were dusty, no street lights, buses and lorries without tail lights... cars and motorcyclists were kicking up dusts as they revved up their engines, overtaking and honking as they went by. No idea why they do that, maybe to warn other vehicles that they are approaching. bah....

Totally immersed in the environment as I pondered. I was baffled, lost for words as I expected something more. Structurally incompetent looking on to the fact that its the hub for greater things to come.

2250hrs - Got to Windsor Castle... completely surprised me. I couldnt get my head around it. It was a bungalow, lying slap right in the middle of a lalang field. 30-50m on the left and right, another bungalow, supposedly for IBM and Alcatel (we know because we went to the wrong bungalow and the person came out to ask... IBM?? Alcatel??)

2300hrs - Checked in and everything... thought, better not expect anymore... then swooosh... the whole lot was WIFI activated and they had satellite which made my day!! Most of all, they had ESPN.. which completes my EPL quest for the next 2 weeks!

2315hrs - Ordered a nasi Briyani... which was nice! Lets see if I get HSH tmr (Hoi Sui Hao - in Cantonese which equals to opening the tap which equals to diarrhoea!! hehe) Then only to find out air con not working under conditions of 35 degrees Celcius. Luckily there is fan.

2325hrs - Phoommph.... The lights went out. 15 seconds in total. It came back on. I was rooted to where I stood.

2340hrs - Again... Phooommph... the lights went out. I called receptionist. They were running on generators because so happened power went out today. Acceptable.

2345hrs - As I was flipping through the channels... delighted as there was almost 75 channels on satellite... then... pweeeeee.... the tv went blank on me. It spaced out on me. The blue screen reappeared and after another 5 seconds, it came back on. I was again rooted.

2355hrs - The tv went off again... (please take note I was watching The Exorcist on HBO) I guess it was time to turn it off and sleep. Think no more. Imagine no more. Tomorrow's a better day!

Nites.

Incredible India Day I... more to come. *I miss my bed at home, not that I am fussy and not the adventurer type but.... *

Huh??....

I mean, should they even go there??? .... These are the excerps... :


"We tell the worshipper of the cross (the Pope) that you and the West will be defeated, as is the case in Iraq, Afghanistan, Chechnya," said a Web statement by the Mujahideen Shura Council.
"We shall break the cross and spill the wine ... God will (help) Muslims to conquer Rome ... (May) God enable us to slit their throats, and make their money and descendants the bounty of the mujahideen," said the statement, posted on Sunday on an Internet site often used by al Qaeda and other militant groups.
-extracted from The Star Online 180906

This is what I call radical and extreme! And why on earth did the Vatican had to quote those phrases... ?? Why oh why?

Hello India... Incredible?

Dont think I will have ample time to write a long one... currently in KLIA and in another 2 hours will be heading off to Delhi. Hope it'll be a good trip. Will try to update there.

Anyway, just a short one... Liverpool lost again last nite.. which shucks! Why? I thought with everything they had, it would be different! Its not early days and I dont believe in "there's still time" simply because there isnt! aiihh... would it be the same old story again this season? we shall see...

Gotta go now... yuppers. Gotta check out the stalls first... hehehe.... tara... till then... Incredible India awaits me! chao...

Irritating & ...

I love this one... check it out. It's from one of the irritated webbers. Its been a long time coming though... Here goes...

"Hello, my name is Billy and I suffer from guilt for not forwarding 50billion fucking chain letters sent to me by people who actually believe if you send them on, a poor six year old girl in Scotland with a breast on her forehead will be able to raiseenough money to have it removed before her parents sell her to a traveling freak show.

And, do you honestly believe that Bill Gates is going to give you, and everyone to whom you send "his" email, £1000? How stupid are we? Ooooh, looky here!If I scroll down this page and make a wish,I'll get laid by a model I just happen to run into the next day! What a bunch of bullshit.

Maybe the evil chain letter leprechauns will come into my house andsodomize me in my sleep for not continuing a chain letter that was started by St Peter in 5AD and brought to this country by Midget pilgrim stowaways on the Endeavour.Fuck 'em!!

If you're going to forward something, at least send me something mildly amusing.I've seen all the "send this to 10 of your closest friends, and this poor, wretched excuse for a human being will somehow receivea penny from some omniscient being" forwards about 90 times.I don't fucking care.

Show a little intelligence and think about what you're actually contributing toby sending out these forwards. Chances are, it's our own unpopularity.The point being? If you get some chain letter that's threatening to leave you shagless or luckless for the rest of your life, delete it.If it's funny, send it on.Don't piss people off by making them feel guilty about a leper in Botswana with no teeth who has been tied to the arseof a dead elephant for 27 years and whose only salvation is the 5 pence per letter he'll receive if you forward this email.

Now forward this to everyone you know.Otherwise, tomorrow morning your underwear will turn carnivorous and will consume your genitals.

Have a nice day.
Billy Connolly

P.S: Send me 15 quid and then fuck off."

Mr Badawi, Enlighten Me

I read with interest on the sensitive and controversial issues surrounding Khairy, secular state, Islamic self imposed proposition on Malaysia, Lina Joy... and I couldnt help but wonder:

1. How lost can these propagators be.
2. How can Malaysia achieve V2020?
3. How can Malaysia keep her international trades alive by doing so?
4. How are these people going to change the constitutional law when half of Malaysia disagrees on the force-adopted concept?
5. Why is the PM keeping quiet? It has escalated by the day and I have not seen any actions taken by the government.
6. Why is it that after 49 years of Independence, a portion of people's mindsets are still stuck back to 50 years ago? Instead of moving forward, its taken a step back.

This can go on and on forever. Why the commotion about an Islamic state? Malaysia is Malaysia. We are Bangsa Malaysia. What else can there be? Islam is the official religion, Bahasa Melayu is the official language. As sensitive an issue is, what more could there be? Meritocracy? Bumis have all the privelleges they can get. The rest did not complain. Life went on. What else can there be to satisfy the palate of these glory seekers? I am dumbfounded.

I returned to Malaysia after a 7 year overseas stint in hope of a better future. It was better there. So much better. I was treated the same as what and how others are. It was fair play there. I was enjoying it, the benefits and the perks. BUT, I came back, because deep inside, I know, there is still hope back home. Its been a year plus since my return. I am sorry to say, I regret my decision making then. If the government can answer JUST this ONE question for me, I will be more than gratified.

What am I supposed to tell Malaysians who are planning to return to Malaysia? *please respond to this following question - Tell me, should I come back to Malaysia? Is it SAFE? Economically viable and stable? Politically?*

And there we are, hoping that Malaysians abroad would come back and serve the nation. How naive. I was so #@*&!

Thank you.

...Bah...

Ok.. great. My laptop went dead on me. This is the last thing I need on Merdeka. Not that it went dead completely, but, without the internet or a connection to do work, I am literally disconnected from the world because my work requires communication and connection. Which again, says how frustrated I am now.

Anyway, after much thought today, guess its all back to square one. No one can keep a balancing act for long. I am very much worked up and I guess its only good for me.

Iph is great. On the other hand, its not as though its KL. Only Perakians know, or for that matter, Ipohans. It's not a dead town as proclaimed, neither is it an extremely happening town. Probably coming in on second after KL, Pg, JB, S'gor. But it sure is good to be back. Home is where the heart is. KLites wont understand. Neither will they grasp the excitement coming from the term 'balik kampung' during festive seasons. Neither will they also understand how lucky they are to be coming from the heart of urban life. Trust me, it makes a big big difference.

Anyway, enuf about that. I've been on a cranky streak all week long. Dunno why, dont intend to know. All I know is, its bothering me and to make it worse, guess it has something to do with my work. Maybe I should really learn how to relax but even this word 'relax' has been only recently coined by someone for my dictionary. So much for today. From Iph with Love.